Forty fingers and counting.....

Willard, MO, day three..... One thing my kids have never had the chance to experience is the exhilaration of celebrating the 4th of July, with a good-old backyard fireworks display.

Thanks to the fact that we live in an area where tinder is the state flower, drought is the state motto, and civil litigation is state's #1 indoor sport, southern californians are not allowed to purchases backyard fireworks..... Safe and sane, or otherwise.

Well in Missouri, where Americans are still allowed to decide for themselves how many fingers they possess, fire works are freely available. Kathie and I stumbled upon this "superdome" of fireworks.

Twenty minutes later we had $75 worth of pyrotechnic mayhem with which to impress the kids! More on this later!


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Ready... Aim.... Fire!

Having grown up in a metropolitan area (read, anywhere in San Diego County) my kids have missed out on a lot of the down to earth activities.  As a child of eight, my grandmother taught the proper technique for slaughtering two chickens simultaneous with a pocket knife, my mother taught me how to slaughter a pig, and as a member of the rifle team, my junior high taught me the correct way to handle and shoot a firearm.

In the sanitized, politically correct world in which we live my kids have missed out on these and many other life experiences.  Experiences that I am sure have molded me into the twisted freak that I am today.

During day two of our stay in Willard, MO Matt & Paula finally got to experience the handling and shooting of a firearm, specifically a Ruger .22 caliber rifle.  Matt first had to be assured that the weapon was empty before he would approach it, but once given a very thorough explanation of the weapon, its parts, and use my boy stood there like  champ and took his first shot at a target.  We may go out again today, and this time try to hit the target, but for now, another rite of passage has been checked off the list.

Now I just need to find a couple of chickens, and a pig!

Grammar notwithstanding..... Good Eats!

Day two in Willard, MO started with my now familiar lower back spasms. Having had enough of this funny business, I highjacked one of Kathie's Lidoderm patches. About one hour after applying the patch, my back started to behave itself, and prospects for the day brightened.

One of the ugly side effects of the patch was that I applied it in the bathroom, and in that bathroom was a mirror...... and in that mirror was my face. Suffice it to say that I was briefly startled by the sight of Quasimodo looking back at me. It was clear that I needed caffeine... stat!

With my body freshly caffeinated, the morning proceeded without too much activity, but eventually talk turned to the topic of lunch; and with today being our host's son's birthday the choice of restaurant was his. He chose Lamberts. Tagged as the "Home of the 'Throwed' Roll," what Lamberts lacks in grammatical Q&A, it more than makes up for in quality "comfort" food served in an atmosphere that is both homey and entertaining.

Paula was jazzed by the fried okra that was served automatically as an appetizer. Shortly after our appetizer was delivered, while our group was chit-chatting, a roll was launched overhead like a ballistic missile. I had just witnessed a "Throwed" Roll. Yep, as promised by the sign outside, all you have to do is raise your hand, and from across the room a Lamberts employee turns fresh baked goods into a hot projectile of baked yeasty goodness!

Lamberts doesn't just rest on the novelty of their airborne baked goods, the food is G O O D!!! I wasn't quite brave enough to order the hog jowls, which upon further research turns out to be akin to very thickly sliced bacon, instead I ordered the polish sausage with sauerkraut, baked beans and turnip greens. Lamberts also serves what are called "pass arounds" unlike the flying rolls, these sides (fried potatoes, black eyed peas, macaroni and tomato, et al) are carted around the dining room by serving staff. Just say the word as the pot walks by and scoop of that side dish is plopped onto your plate. It truly was a fun way to enjoy a meal.

Read more about Lamberts at their website....

Mother nature's Light Show

We arrived in Willard, MO at about 1:30 Saturday morning, at about 1:35am we were welcomed with the most awesome electrical storm I've witnessed in a at least 19 years. As tired as we both were, neither Matt nor I could go to sleep, rather we went outside to enjoy the show.

All around us lightning filled the sky, and occasionally we were treated to a close strike where it truly seemed as though the thunder was clapping before the lightning would flash. (Yes Jon, if you're reading this, I know that it is the other way around!)

Today we awoke to a beautiful sky, and air so clean and so fresh that, for a moment at least, it took my mind off the excruciating pain I was feeling in my shoulder and lower back.

Sticking a fork in phase one....

The first phase of our cross country adventure is coming to an end with the close of the TKD championship tournament. Although I'm very proud of Paula, I know that she is a bit disappointed at not placing in either of her title matches. Oh well, there's always next year.... It's Saturday afternoon and we're just waiting for the first matches of the new season to finish. Unlike last year, Paula didn't place in either Weapons or Forms. Her sparring match is currently underway and I have my fingers crossed.

Our car is packed, and we're ready to head out of Little Rock as soon as Paula's ring bows out. Then we begin phase two of our summer adventure, a trip to Willard, MO to visit with friends.

As usual, my Twitter feed will be the most up to date source of info while on the road.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

And now the big event!

Paula has her game face on as she waits for her ring to start. Nine girls will be gunning for Paula. I think I'm more nervous than she is!


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Let the competition begin!

Day 5 of our trip...... And first day of competition. This is Paula, concentrating before her first round of weapon competition. Paula was the #5 point earner in the world this year.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Poor man's sauna

It's amazing how much dirty clothes four people can accumulate over three days on the road. Fortunately the Best Western provides access to a washer and dryer on site. With a side benefit...... In a non-airconditioned area of the hotel, the temperature in the laundry area is hovering around 110. I was thoroughly soaked after doing a load of clothes and got to experience the joys of a sauna without the expense of a high priced spa membership! Yes!


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

The best laid plans of mice and men...

Well here I find myself on day 3 of our trip, with
most things having gone according to plan. Our first real glitch was when the Travelodge in Amarillo failed to come through with it's promised "in-room wi-fi," consequently my blog posts have not been on schedule.

The second kink in the plan has been our failure to hit the road this morning at 7:00 am as planned. Today will be our longest leg at 500 miles. Oh yeah, as far as not starting on time..... Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. I was the one that had trouble getting up. The last couple of days have been a drain on me.

Well, Kathie and the kids are grousing at me to get going, so one last note, as I sit here in Starbucks enjoying my "Pikes Place" blend..... I obviously have not been able to post to the blog as frequently as I would like, but I do get more opportunities to send a quick stream of thought to my Twitter feed. Because of that I've moved my feed to a position higher up on the blog site. Hope you enjoy my 140 character rants.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Standing on a corner in Holbrook Arizona.....

Yep. If the Eagles had gone a few extra miles and stayed in Holbrook, I'm pretty sure "Take It Easy" would not have been nearly as popular a song.

Monday morning finds our weary travellers, waking up in "The Charming Town of Holbrook." * today's leg of the voyage will be about 50 miles shorter than yesterday's send off leg. And quite a bit shorter than tomorrow's 600 mile endurance leg. But everytime I start feeling as though I'm really hard core, I think of Ros Savage, who is currently rowing across the Pacific ocean. Of course, she doesn't have Matt and Paula with her. Read more about Roz at www.rozsavage.com very cool lady.

Well without giving too much detail I'm being asked to hurry, so more later.

* From the Holbrook visitors guide. Really a tri-fold pamphlet, but budgets are tight.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

On Pins and Needles...

Needles, CA. Not sure why it's called needles, but I was able to needle Paula into smiling at one of few signs of civilization...... Beer.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

My personal Oasis

No doubt the first of many stops. I am ever thankful for the fact that you're never more than a 9-iron away from a Starbucks!


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

False Starts and Delayed Departures

Right on cue. 5 minutes into our trip..... "Oh!!! I forgot my travel journal!". 15 minutes later, we try again.


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

90 minutes to takeoff....

It's 5:30 am and the gears are starting to turn on this machine we call a family. The squeaky wheel, the boy, is doing everything he can to remain as invisible as he can.

Girl, who is not accustomed to seeing the early side of 11 am on a non school day is uncharacteristically alert and eager to help.

The queen bee who was up pretty late last night has just finished unsuccessfully attempting to negotiate a Sunday afternoon departure. She is now up and moving about.

Yours truly? Yep, the captain of this disaster movie has been up for an hour now, and is resolutely dragging his crew with only a little kicking and no screaming toward a 7 am departure.

The weather looks favorable, the car is ready. Next stop, and next report, Needles, CA. ETA. 12pm pst.

Time to shove off!


-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Almost time to rest....

As you can see from my handy iPhone To-Do list, I am just about ready for tomorrow's grand adventure. I am tired, and I still need to pack my clothes. My problem is that the ladies are out having a "Mani-Pedi," so I don't know which suitcases we're taking, and if Ill have room for three days worth of clothing, or if I'll just have to settle for taking a loin cloth and some sandals.

Those if you that know me, know that the loin cloth option is a decidedly unattractive one!

-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

Where the rubber meets the road.

As mentioned in my last post, our voyage first required a trip to the tire shop. I wouldn't normally bother my readers with the details of so mundane a task, but I thought I would take the opportunity to throw out a plug for a great outfit.

Those of you unfortunate enough to know me personally know that I, generally speaking, don't like people and will do anything possible to limit my contact with others. (I do, of course, make exceptions as is evidenced by my two lovely children.) America's Tire Company also known as Discount Tires in some locations caters to my need for minimal human contact. They have a great system where you can go to their website, check availability and reserve your tires and an installation appointment. Very slick setup.

Today I arrived at ATC told the fellow at the counter my name, swiped my debit card, handed him my keys, and was done. All I had left to do was find a corner of the waiting area, and start writing this post.

All in all.... A very pleasant experience. Oh and by the way...... Total cost about $100 cheaper than CostCo, and no CostCo crowds!

-- Posted by Frank, while out and about with his iPhone.

6000 miles in a Honda Pilot

..... or, "What was I thinking?"

Well the countdown is now set at T-Minus 24 hours and counting for the great Azevedo cross-country adventure. Fallbrook, CA to Clayton, NC...... Oh yeah with stops in Little Rock, AR for some sporting event ;-) and a stop in Willard, MO for some wild drunken debauchery......

I hope to do a slightly better than adequate job of memorializing this trip with frequent (time permitting) posts to this blog.

Our group, which I will lovingly refer to as "Donner, Part of Four," should still be on speaking terms by the time this is all over.

Well a famous Chinese proverb says: "Even a journey of 5000 miles begins with a stop at the tire store..." or something like that. So off I go to the tire shop for my first step in prepping for this epic voyage. (Homer's Iliad and Odyssey, have nothing on what I expect to endure the next three weeks!)